Hi Thelma, it’s my pleasure to share my thoughts with you.
Regarding vulnerability…one of the reasons I am so well versed in the holographic mechanism of creation is because I have personally suffered thru debilitating and paralyzing feelings about the condition of this world, especially the animal kingdom and the way we (humans) disrespect basically every life form.
Our collective treatment of animals became so severe to me at points on my journey that I considered leaving the planet…it was at a final moment of despair and deep questioning about why I felt this pain so acutely…and why others seemed to be oblivious to it…that I was guided to understand the reflective nature of my holographic reality system and how my continual attraction of thoughts/feelings and horrifying realities (which always pointed to the vulnerability of innocent animals) were actually a mirror to my own debilitating feelings of vulnerability, of feeling too sensitive, permeable and unsafe in this toxic society.
My deeply feminine nature has always been such that I take on the pain of life and others as my own, and so it took me decades to see the truth and unravel the layers…but when I did, and I was able to start healing my core wounds…my outer world started shift. I knew right then that I had a definite imbalance in my male-female energy…that I was receiving/accepting TOO much… and that I needed to pay more attention to the (masculine) areas in my self & life that were suffering from a lack of boundaries and inner authority.
When I began to harness my own inner masculine/divine protection from within me, my outer world then started to reflect that new inner space by “protecting me” from the types of information/thoughts/situations that were continually derailing me. While undergoing that shift I had to work hard to ignore the atrocities as I was making my way to higher ground, but when I finally was able to 1) heal my core wounds (feminine) and 2) put up a solid boundary to the harshness of the physical world (masculine) I began to detach from planetary suffering as a personal emotion and accept/see the bigger picture.
That is when I understood that the way we treat living things on this planet was actually a collective projection of our own human suffering…that our disrespect for the world around us is really just a reflection of our own self loathing, lack of self respect and self love. That understanding is ultimately what helped me to pull myself out from under myself which shifted everything in my hologram to reflect the emerging peace and acceptance I was was beginning to feel.
I still have to work at this, but it is not nearly as crippling as it used to be for me. I had a MAJOR test of initiation arrive at the 888 gate, one so severe that I think it could have potentially taken my life just 3 years ago…tho it took me some time/courage, I was eventually able to stare it down with my newly emerging and empowered feelings and divine understanding in a way I never expected to be able to.
Once the core wound is cauterized…and in most cases, these deep feelings of vulnerability stem from THE original wound of separation from GOD…it takes some practice to build our resistance up, but as sad and as hard as it is, we MUST transcend these feelings of vulnerability within ourselves if we are going to attract/create/project a reality of LOVE/peace and purity and simultaneously steward the planet into a world of the same.
I share all this in hopes that you see yourself in me because I certainly see myself in you.
I’m not sure if I need to protect my boundaries more or just get more detached in my personal life as some of the people around me are manipulative and disrespectful.
And to that I would say that yes, self LOVE (feminine) is key, but also self LOVE in action (masculine)….by way of respecting yourself more in order to command the respect of others…by knowing your worth and therefore not being willing to accept anything less…by harnessing your inner authority to stand in your sovereignty and fully own your (GOD) power….just in your presence alone.
As always, this is all an inside job, one that will shift your hologram (as if by magic) to present you with a new reality based on your new ability to LOVE yourself more.
I have a feeling that Lesson 2.5 in the new e-course may be helpful for you here…the timing couldn’t be more perfect.