MemberDecember 5, 2020 at 10:22 pm
If for no other reason that my situation has given you a glimmer of solidarity, I’m glad I posted.
What really struck me is when you said: ‘just when I thought it was safe to resurrect, I get hit by this’ and that’s how I feel, too. I have to watch the mind-victim-thought pattern that wants to say ‘I told you so’ and chime in with the usual drab commentary or excuses (like any of that is actually keeping me safe – and from what anyway?)
I also feel that if these situations conspire to flatten me/us or take us off our feet, then maybe we need to listen? It’s mentally impossible for me to not be doing something; striving, achieving, feeling inferior to all those who ‘are’ doing more than me. I ask for grace and ease but then my ego gets in the way with its control-freak ways.
I have to ask myself, ‘when will it be enough?’
I’m making a concerted effort to notice, in all of this, emerging lessons, especially around support – how am I supported? What happens when I let myself be supported? When I let go of control?
I’m very grateful that you responded and I wish that you also will experience the lifting and the revelation and the ‘other side’ that we so (im)patiently wish for.
It will come. And it will be worth it.
Sending healing energy your way,
p.s. to make the point … I tried to post this and got an error message: ERROR: Slow down; you move too fast.